Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. What's the big deal about Harry Potter? Based upon the phenomenally successful Harry Potter book series, this movie about a young boy with sorcerer's powers is just a fanciful tale, right? That depends upon whether or not you are concerned about what God thinks about the subject. No matter what good points this movie may have, this is what the Bible has to say about its main theme: "There shall not be found among you anyone who makes his son or his daughter pass through the fire, or one who practices witchcraft, or a soothsayer, or one who interprets omens, or a sorcerer, or one who conjures spells, or a medium, or a spiritist, or one who calls up the dead. For all who do these things are an abomination to the Lord" (Deuteronomy 18:10-11). An abomination before the Lord? A thing cannot be both good for kids and an abomination. Sorry folks — I used to read fantasy novels as a kid, so I understand the appeal of Harry Potter. But if you care about what God thinks about the subject, stay away. (Reviewer—H. L.)

He Got Game. Denzel Washington stars in this gritty Spike Lee movie about a convicted murderer who is "released" from Attica temporarily in order to convince his number one NCAA prospect basketball-playing son to attend select the governor's pet college upon graduation in exchange for the promise of early release. His son, Jesus — cajoled, bribed, lured, guilt-tripped, and tempted from all sides — now he can add his father to the list. This movie, which started out with the potential as a poignant tale about reuniting father and son, gradually deteriorates into a film about the weakness of the human spirit. In the first half-hour, there seem to be hope as Washington, who initially appears to have had a sincere regeneration in prison, struggles to regain the love of his family. But the real spirit of this movie reveals itself and the downhill slide is fast and furious. The profanity makes its appearance at the start, and once the overt sexual activity appears, it only worsens until even fast-forward is so offensive that it's not even safe to guess when to stop. Once this occurs, what was once a favorable presentation of the Savior Jesus takes it severely on the chin (the son's name is pronounced "Jee-sus," not "Hay-soos," as might be expected, and this pronunciation and the symbolism that surrounds it is a key element in the film). There is no redeeming value in this movie. Shame on Denzel Washington for this one. If we'd noticed that this was a Spike Lee movie, we wouldn't have rented it. Wish us better observation skills next time. Rated R. (Reviewer—H. L.)

Hidalgo. Viggo Mortenson, Omar Sharif. Whether actually a true story or based on legend (see “True Story or Tall Tale?” at http://www.thelongridersguild.com/equus-oct.htm),  this is a very entertaining film with no unpleasant on-screen surprises and no bad language. It is a moving story about an epic 3,000-mile horse race across the Saudi Arabian desert, pitting a lone American cowboy and his wild mustang pony against prized Arabian thoroughbreds, racing on their own turf. Viggo Mortenson (of “Lord of the Rings”) plays Frank Hopkins (whose memoirs are the basis for the story), a soft-spoken, self-effacing cowboy, who has turned to long-distance horse racing as a way of escaping the emotional trauma that lies in his past. Omar Sharif is the all-powerful Sheik, who represents an alien Muslim culture that Mortenson must survive, in addition to the extremely hostile desert environment of the race. There’s lots of action adventure to keep this 2+ hour movie going, including several (bloodless) sword and gun battles, horse chases, and bandit attacks. One scene, however, showing a violent injury to a horse would likely be too disturbing for young viewers. Otherwise, sit back and enjoy this completely clean, beautifully filmed story about a valiant little pony named Hidalgo and the man who rides him. PG-13 rated for the action; but more like G for other content.(Reviewer—G. P)

Hitch.  (PG-13).  Will Smith, Kevin James. This is a genuinely funny (and at times very funny) and entertaining movie. Will Smith and Kevin James have great chemistry, as do all the other players in the film. And while it's a predictable comedy-romance, it's told with surprising twists at nearly every turn. It's exceptionally clean, though it does contain a number of instances of crude language, and one of profanity, spoken in the heat of the moment. Otherwise, this is an enjoyable, clever story about a "date-doctor," who coaches insecure, ordinary men by helping them to create opportunities to meet and win the hearts of the women of their dreams. Despite his sophisticated rules of conduct, however, Hitch also needs a "date doctor" by the end of the film, prompting the question, "can the physician heal himself?"  The "prescription," and moral of the story, as it turns out, is simple: just be yourself. Enjoy. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Holes. Based on the popular young people's novel of the same title, the movie lives up to its glowing reviews: A fun, engaging film, clean, and entertaining for a general audience. It's about a work camp for teenage boys who've gotten in trouble with the law, and as their punishment, are set to digging holes in the blazing hot desert in order “to improve their character.” While it seems at first that the plot is going nowhere, perseverance pays off. Just as the movie comes to a close, the pieces of the story fall into place and the story is made complete. (Modest cautions: Some viewers may not like it that initially the plot is based on a family “curse”; there are instances of cruel teasing and arguing among the boys; brief scenes showing bad guys getting shot in a “Wild West” context, and threatening interactions with rattlesnakes and poisonous lizards, but these are likely to be upsetting only to the very youngest of viewers.) John Voight is brilliant as a tyrannical camp enforcer, and Sigourney Weaver is appropriately intimidating as the “warden.” Comical at times, the storyline also offers a bit of drama and a satisfying resolution. Enjoy. Rated PG. (Reviewer — G. P.)

1/2 House of Flying Daggers. PG-13. This is a love story, beautifully filmed, with extraordinary visuals, color, and sound. Set in ninth century China, the story pits a young woman, highly skilled in marshal arts, against an ambitious young officer tasked with discovering the hiding place of the rebel group she belongs to, "The House of Flying Daggers." A handsome young man, pretending to be her guardian, and a beautiful young girl presented to him as a blind dancer: put them together on the road of "escape," and the result is, well, rather unpredictable. There's lots of unique, stunningly original marshal arts action, and an engaging story. Be aware, however, that things do get a bit rough at times, as our heroine is forcefully attacked by her admirers; also, that this is not a typical Hollywood  romance. If you don't want to be left feeling sorrowful, don't watch; or, just turn off the sound and enjoy the gorgeous color and novel action sequences. At times, it's a bit too violent and bloody for younger children; best for older ones and adults. Note also that the DVD offers an optional English audio track, eliminating the need for reading subtitles. Unfortunately, however, the dialogue in English is almost comically simple at times, a jarring contrast to the sophisticated visuals of the film. Nevertheless, this is a dramatically different viewing experience, a refreshing change from the average Hollywood fare.   (Reviewer — G. P.)

Hoosiers. You may have to dust off the box, but this one's a keeper. Gene Hackman stars in this terrific movie about an ex-college basketball coach who takes on the challenge of whipping into shape the basketball team of a small Indiana high school. In a town in which basketball is all but the local religion, Hackman begins ruffling feathers when he's more interested in teaching discipline and fundamentals than shooting baskets. Complicating matters, he takes under his wing the local basketball enthusiast and town drunk, Shooter (played by Dennis Hopper), the father of one of the boys on the team. There is some mild language, but overall, this is a movie about teamwork, determination, and hope that will leave you cheering. Besides, how can you not root for a team whose bus is driven by the local preacher who hangs a sign over the driver's seat "In case of rapture, this bus will be unmanned"? Rated PG. (Reviewer—H. L.)

1/2. I Robot. Will Smith. Based on a series of stories by Isaac Assimov, I Robot is okay, but at the same time, disappointing. It lacks the creative spark and self-deprecating humor of its earlier Will-Smith cousins, Men in Black 1 & 2. Instead, it relies heavily on computer-generated graphics for creating the interest and the action. Add a new generation humanoid talking robot, harking back to Star Wars, and bit of "Hal," the out-of-control computer, in 2001, and you've got the basic elements of the film. After a major performance in Muhammad Ali, Will Smith seems here to be not particularly interested in the role of a cranky cop who is at war with himself and with the world of robotics. He has little to do but to act tough and chase the bad guys. Set in the near future, the plot turns on the apparent murder of a scientist who created a new generation of intelligent robots designed to perform manual labor for humans. Smith suspects one of them has gone bad and committed the murder, thereby violating "the three basic rules" that keep them from harming human beings. He, of course, must battle against his superiors who think he's crazy (a tiresome TV cliché) and find the rogue-robot before things get out of control. There's a good bit of swearing throughout the movie, and in two instances, blatant and offensive use of the Lord's name in vain. The visuals may be appealing to young people accustomed to computer games, but watching legions of computer-generated robots fighting a dramatic battle is itself a "green screen" cliché (thousands of CG-clones armed with swords). There's a bit of a twist in the "who-done-it" plot at the end; but otherwise, the film is pretty one-dimensional. With a couple of judicious edits to remove unnecessary cursing, this would be a clean and generally entertaining, if undistinguished, futuristic film. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Ice Age. This is a wonderful film, the kind of movie that's great for the holidays and for (almost) the whole family (young children might be upset by some scenes showing animals in jeopardy). It's very funny at times, with gags going back to the old Roadrunner days; but it's moving, as well. If you just want to kick back and escape into a world of pure entertainment and come away feeling good, this one's for you. Here's the “plot”: three pre-historic animals encounter a human baby on their way “south” during the Ice Age, and set the task of returning it to its human family. Misadventures ensue. There are a couple of references to evolution and "politically correct" values that might make some viewers uneasy, but they are minimal and should be noticed only by adults. Ultimately, the film affirms the value of loyalty and friendship. One of the “extras” on the DVD is the Academy Award winning animated short-film “Bunny,” a beautiful rendering of how an aged “Bunny” passes from this life into the next. The most theologically conservative might object to the story line, which brings her “husband” back as a moth, first to annoy her (it's very funny), then to lead her into eternity. Graphics and sound are “award winning,” as must be said about “Ice Age,” as well. (Reviewer — G. P.)

  The Ice Harvest. (R) John Cusack, Billy Bob Thorton, Randy Quaid. John Cusack is always interesting on screen. But this film takes him into dark, vulgar, violent places--and leaves him there. Disappointing. A strong caution: This is not a film suitable for Christian audiences. (Reviewer — G. P.)

The Importance of Being Ernest. (PG, 2003) Rupert Everett, Reese Witherspoon, Colin Firth, Frances O'Connor. Based on the play by Oscar Wilde, this is a great romp about bachelors behaving badly, set in Victorian England. An English society bachelor, John, creates a fictitious brother, Ernest, to give him an excuse to leave his country estate and travel to London. There, John dons the persona of Ernest, the name by which he is known to the woman he loves. Upon proposing to her, he put under the microscope by her aunt, who will not let her niece marry him without her approval, and decides that in order to make himself presentable, he must "get rid of" Ernest. The problem, he discovers, is that his fiancé loves the name Ernest and pledges that she would not love him without it. Meanwhile, his friend Algernon discovers that John has a beautiful young charge, Reese Witherspoon, that he hides in the country — away from his rascal us friend — and determines to assume the persona of the fake brother in order to meet her. The antics ensue. This is a wonderful, sweet film, this grow more complicated by the minute. Ultimately, it is not the mistaken identity that unravels the two rascals, but their love for their women, whom they determine to woo back at any cost. This is definitely a "chick flick" with great costumes, subtle wit, and a happy ending. And it has a few twists thrown in to make it even more delightful. Enjoy! (Reviewer — H. L.)

In Her Shoes. (PG-13) Cameron Diaz, Shirley MacLaine. Definitely a chick's chick-flick. Overly long and tedious at first, the film's interest level builds, however, as the motivations of the characters are slowly revealed. Cameron Diaz plays a spoiled, apparently lazy young beauty--with a secret--who is living off of her looks, and petty theft from her friends and family. Her older sister is the plain one, struggling with self-image and men--and the opportunistic practices of her little sister. In desperate financial straits and with nowhere to go, Diaz turns to her long-lost grandmother (Shirley MacLaine ) living in a Florida retirement community--a hard-edged woman who, of course, turns out to have a heart of gold. There's no bad language; but there's a good deal of the leggy-Diaz to see, in her bikini. In the end, however, there's a good moral and some life lessons about discovering your gifts and learning to accept the person you've been created to be. Patience here, both within the film and for viewers, proves to be a virtue. (Reviewer — G. P.)

The Incredibles.  (PG).  A strange blend of TV-sitcom, James Bond, and Power Rangers. As an animated "cartoon," the visuals are pretty amazing,  revealing just how close to reality the technology has become. Mr. Incredible, a super-hero, and his super-hero colleagues have been outlawed by the civil authorities who deem their exploits a danger to society. Mr. Incredible and his family are therefore "relocated" and reduced to a dull suburban existence, supported by Mr. I's job as an insurance claims adjuster. His wife, also a super-hero (Elastigirl), settles in to raise her two super-endowed kids, whose powers are yet to be fully developed. This portion of the movie is as slow and dull as it sounds. Things change dramatically, however, when evil rears its head on a catastrophic scale, and Mr. I has to go to work again. Enter some pretty amazing animated action that is non-stop for the remaining hour battles and clever sight-gags that pit machine against man, and a jealous little evil boy against the hulking but vulnerable superhero and his family. Younger children may find the storyline too hard to follow and be put off by the first slow hour, but also too young for the violence and kinetic action that follows. Adults may find the animation/cartoon style too PowerRanger-y. But all in all, this is an entertaining "action film," free of objectionable language and content. Bottom line: it's an eye-popping, entertaining (though over-long) rental that should be fun for both adults and older children. (Reviewer — G. P.)

  The Inside Man. A Spike Lee film with Denzel Washington. A bank robbery apparently goes wrong, but is really a deliberate cover for stealing diamonds from the vault of a Nazi sympathizer who got rich from the wealth extracted from the Jews during WWII. An improbable and very tiring and too-long movie involving bank hostages, negotiations with the head of the robbery gang, the extensive shifting and intermixing of hostages with the gang of perpetrators--all of whom are disguised by the same clothing and face masks. One wonders why they bothered making it. (Reviewer—G.P.)

The Interpreter.  (PG-13)  This is a really interesting film, despite its weak reviews. Sean Penn and Nicole Kidman play wounded characters, faced with the imminent assassination attempt of a brutal African dictator. Kidman has grown up in his country in southern Africa, and is working as a translator in at the United Nations. Penn, an FBI agent, has just six weeks earlier lost his wife to another man, who drives her into a bridge abutment and kills them both. This is not your typical action intrigue film: It's not based on physical action, so much as a character study of how each of these characters come comes to know, and eventually, learns to trust each other. Complex relationships between both Penn and Kidman and, reaching back to her youth in Africa where she, along with her brother, for a time took up arms to protest the dictatorship. Old friends are killed, the brother is eventually, we learn, also killed; she decides to take revenge on the dictator who is responsible for the killing of her family and has come to New York to speak before the United Nation. The movie contains good moral lessons along the way about forgiveness, and about how revenge harms the avenger more than the avenged. Very clean, no sexual content; and only one brief outburst of profanity mid-way through; otherwise no bad language. A surprisingly good movie, thoughtful and sensitively made. Don't expect the action to keep you awake, however. But suitable for thoughtful audiences who are willing to follow the progression of the relationship as it grows between these two lonely, wounded human beings.  (Reviewer — G. P.)

1/2 In Good Company.  (PG-13). Dennis Quaid and Scarlett Johansson. This is "Death of a Salesman" for the 21st Century. An interesting and not so predictable portrayal of how the winds of corporate, global enterprises can blow through the lives of ordinary employees with devastating and equally fickle destruction. There's frequent use of rough language, however, and some swearing, which jars the senses at times; so unless you're prepared to overlook it, you'd probably best avoid watching. However, it's the language of the workplace, of anger, frustration, arrogance, in the secular world. Also, many viewers will find the choice of two of the main characters to be so quick to bed uncomfortable. On the positive side is the central story: an ambitious,  26-year-old corporate ad salesman finds himself the new boss of an advertising staff made up of seasoned professionals working for a major sports magazine. Among them is Dennis Quaid, whose job the new kid is taking. Quaid's 18-year-old daughter (Scarlett Johansson) unwittingly runs interference as she gets involved with the new boss. Quaid, unable to restrain his instincts as a protective father, puts his job on the line to assert himself as a voice of reason and moral appropriateness. He is the good dad, the faithful husband, and over-extended  financially because of his daughter's choice for an expensive college, yet happy to be having another child at the age of 51. This "functional family" is the core that holds everything and everyone else together in the movie. So despite the rough language, this is an interesting and entertaining film, mostly because it goes against the grain of expectations. What seems a potentially cliché movie about the clash of generations and corporate global take-overs turns into a sensitive and generally satisfying morality play about right and wrong, and about how people should ultimately treat each other, beyond concern for the bottom line. There are no visually uncomfortable scenes, though a dorm room affair is shown about to begin. Overall, give this one a B+.  (Reviewer — G. P.)

Intolerably Cruelty. I woke up the morning after watching this movie feeling like I had a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe. It’s a Cohen brothers film (“O Brother Where Art Thou?”), so it should have come as no surprise that it was laced with profanity. But the opening scene contains in-your-face swearing and sexual “humor” that is very offensive to unsuspecting viewers. Fast forward and the movie settles into a slow-paced comedy about a high-power divorce lawyer and a devious beauty looking to make a big score by marrying—and then divorcing—for money. George Clooney and Catherine Zeta-Jones are good together, and there are a couple of big laughs along the way. But one of the characters, Cedric The Entertainer uses language that is particularly offensive, including the repeated, gratuitous use of God’s name in vain. Even more shocking, the film is rated PG. So, viewers beware. There are a lot of wonderful “battle-of-the-sexes” comedies—from Shakespeare’s “Taming of the Shrew” to the classic Tracy vs. Hepburn films—but this isn’t one of them. Despite the occasional humor and clever interaction between Clooney and Zeta-Jones, this is a movie to be avoided. Rated PG. (Reviewer — G. P.

  1/2  The Island.  PG-13. Starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson. Set in the not-so-distant future, this is an exceedingly clean film that tells the story of biological clones, "products" who are being grown and maintained as potential sources of body parts for the rich and famous, who may need them at some point as medical replacements. The clones learn of their dark origins and purpose, escape the pod-factory, and must fend off the bad guys who are chasing them in black SUVs and helicopters, trying to capture and destroy them. Unfortunately, the story is thin and the running time too long. But there's lots of special effects driving/flying and action-chase scenes; so if you like this sort of film and have some time to fill, this is a safe bet, suitable for all audiences. (Reviewer — G. P.)

1/2 The Italian Job. A clever new version of a 1969 film by the same title (that one starring Michael Caine), this update is a stylish and intelligent heist movie that keeps you on the edge of your seat and your heart pumping. An ensemble cast of high-sakes thieves are betrayed after their theft of $35 million worth of gold bars, and the plot turns on their efforts to rectify their loss. Set in Venice, Philly, and L.A., the film also co-stars a set of toy-like Mini-Coopers—a BMW spin-off model that's a small a mini-compact but as powerful and maneuverable as a sports car—and features some fun stunt-car driving scenes. Add some high-tech computer hacking, drama-laden safe-cracking (the lady's specialty), and a punched-up techno-sound track and you're in for an entertaining movie caper. Unfortunately, the script is laced with some occasional swearing (including a couple of uses of the Lord's name in vain) and includes a vulgar hand gesture; but otherwise, it's visually very clean. There are also a couple of stark, though bloodless, shootings. But some truly comic moments, as well, and even some feel-good dialogue that's actually a bit too schmaltzy to fit the film. All-in-all, with some tolerance for sporadic, moderate use of language, this is a fun film, entertaining and non-offensive for adults who can tolerate a couple of instances of gun-violence, a smattering of swearing, and an occasional bit of off-color humor. Rated PG-13. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Just Cause. Not a particularly well-done legal thriller with excessive profanity and themes of gore and violence against children. Biblical themes are presented as part of the character development for one of the main and most violent and objectionable of the characters, so needless to say, Christianity is not painted in a good light. Borderline tolerable on television, but even television viewing can't improve the plot or the disturbing themes. Sean Connery and Ed Harris can't save this one. It is not worth watching. (Reviewer—H. L.)

Kate and Leopold. Reminiscent of You've Got Mail — a sweet romantic comedy with nothing but the few obligatory profanities to get the rating. This is an absolutely terrific film — less the annoying obligatory words that you could count on one hand — starring Meg Ryan and Hugh Jackman, about a Duke from 1876 who accidentally falls through a hole in the space-time fabric and into the life of Meg Ryan, who plays a high-powered marketing executive unhappy with her life. Jackman's gentility, integrity, and straightforwardness stand out as much in modern-day New York City his attire, and the interaction between new and old is handed with tact, grace, and wit. Unlike other comedies, in which characters of integrity are inevitably worn down by the vulgarity around them, Hugh Jackman's character has a positive (and, hopefully, lasting) impact on everyone around him. A very funny, feel-good movie that is thoroughly enjoyable. (Reviewer — H. L. )

1/2. King Arthur. King Arthur (PG-13)
Drawing on historical research suggesting the legend of King Arthur originates not from the Middle Ages, but rather is based on the leader of a small band of tribal "Sarmatian Knights" during the early 5th century near the time of the fall of Rome, this is a remarkable drama dripping with the trappings of epic big-screen action. Beautifully  filmed,  it portrays King Arthur (Clive Owen) as the son of mixed races, his father, of noble Roman descent and his mother of what would have been at the time, primitive, pagan Britons. Themes of free-will, destiny, and faith drive the plot, which puts Arthur, who prays to God in one scene and talks about his "faith" (never made explicitly Christian) at odds both with his pagan friends and with an unscrupulous bishop of the Catholic church. Arthur has an even more dangerous enemy, however: the brutal, savage race of Saxons, who are invading the shores of Britain. Add the love interest of a beautiful "Guinevere" (Keira Knightley), who turns out to be a fierce warrior princess, and some violent but seemingly true-to-life battles with bloody swords and warrior horses, and you get an intense original film that's compelling to watch. It's not for the feint of heart, however; there's a good bit of graphic battlefield action whose climactic confrontation with the Saxons inevitably leads to the heart-wrenching deaths of some of the knights. A fifth century "Band of Brothers," this is a sobering and original treatment of history, as well as a memorable story, beautifully filmed in wild landscapes with lots of compelling interactions between the characters. There's no swearing; and but one romantic scene, which is brief, and tastefully cut short.  Otherwise, all of the movie's visual stress comes from the dramatic action, while its emotional angst lies in the bravery and sacrifices that the knights make in the interest of defending each other, and, ultimately, the noble goals that their legend is made of.  (Reviewer — G. P.)

Knight's Tale, A. An all-around feel-good movie for adults. The combination of Medieval romp with modern (if secular) music brings you into the mood of the movie (who can beat Heath Ledger, riding into his first jousting match to "We Will, We Will...Rock You"?). There are a few minor exceptions, but for the most part this movie walks the line between terrific Hollywood filmmaking and respect for biblical values. Considering that Heath Ledger also starred in The Patriot with Mel Gibson, an outstanding movie, it was nice to see him continue in this tradition. The character of Ledger's love interest, played by newcomer Shannyn Sossamon, was irritatingly "modern," but nothing (human, at least) is perfect. Characters show love and respect for one another and exhibit genuine integrity, which is rare in any film. If we could have removed one line of dialog and one implied situation, this would have rated two stars. Rated PG-13 for violence, which is appropriate to the context, and brief nudity (but not the nudity you'd expect — and that's all we'll say about that). (Reviewer—H. L.)

Last Brickmaker in America. This CBS production starring Sidney Poitier is an absolute joy from beginning to end. Poitier stars as a 76-year old brickmaker, a recent widower, who is hired by the town school to make 22,000 bricks for the new library where his wife used to work. Things get complicated when the time runs short and the local contracting outfit tries to strong-arm him out of the job. Undaunted, Poitier vows, in honor of his wife, to overcome weather and time and complete the job "one brick at a time." In the process, he brings joy, purpose, and wisdom to a young, hurting boy and his father, the building project manager, who must choose between his family, his marriage, and his job. Not rated. (Reviewer—H. L.)

1/2 Le Divorce. Starring Kate Hudson, Naomi Watts, and Glenn Close. This film, which more accurately could have been titled “Le Affair,” or “Le Adultery,” is both appealing and disturbing at the same time. A beautiful Merchant Ivory production, there’s an interesting subtext which sets a French upperclass family against two young American sisters living in Paris, who find themselves contesting ownership of a valuable family heirloom, put at risk by a divorce settlement. The contrasting habits and social mores of the French and the Americans make for an interesting story. However, shortly into the film, the barely-twenty-year-old Kate Hudson is propositioned by a well-to-do Frenchman who is married and nearly three times her age. For reasons hard to comprehend, she instantly agrees “to become his mistress.” This, after she has just met and immediately gone to bed with another young man she barely knows. The film, however, is visually clean: couples are seen talking together in bed; and there’s no offensive language. But there’s something quite distasteful and offensive about the casual way in which Hudson’s character buys into the acceptability allowing herself to be used by this serial playboy. Unfortunately, there’s not even a redeeming moral to the story—no regrets, no downside to the “sexual dalliance”; in fact, there’s a fairy tale ending, and the characters are richly rewarded. Which is more than can be said for the viewer, who is left wondering why. Give it two and half stars for the high production value and flawless performances of the actors; but the thematic content makes it impossible to recommend it for general viewing. Rated PG-13 “for mature thematic elements and sexual content.” (Reviewer — G.P.)

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Based on the 500 page comic book, the plot involves an ensemble cast of minor villains, tasked to defeat an evil madman who aims to take over the world. Sean Connery seems out of place in this rather silly movie, which assembles a group of "famous 19th century literary characters," including Dr. Jeckyll (who morphs into a raging muscle-bound Hulk-like giant), Dorian Gray, Captain Nemo, etc., who set out to thwart a plot to destroy Venice, Italy. The movie is harmless enough, but basically empty, featuring lots of explosions, fighting, and special effects, which turn out to be the most interesting part of the movie. Peta Wilson's portrayal of a vampire includes a couple of fake looking bloody moments (PG rated at best); otherwise, the movie is clean and mostly inoffensive (only one slightly audible s- word, and a couple of "God's"). The level of violence, however, is likely too strong for younger children. One caution: the DVD's background interview with the director is full of swearing, which comes as a surprise after the film's much cleaner dialogue. Unless you're interested in the comic book genre, there is not much here to justify a rental. But if your young teenagers want to see it, it's probably as safe as any PG-13 adventure/action film out there (excluding the profanity-laced DVD director's interview, of course). (Reviewer — G. P.)

Legally Blonde. A cute and surprisingly smart movie starring Reese Witherspoon as Elle, an incurably blonde fashion student (with a 4.0) who decides to follow her sweetheart to Yale Law School to show him that she can be serious. Unfortunately, at Yale, she encounters lots of students (and professors) in drab clothes who do not see her flashy clothes and perky personality as a plus. But with her smarts, her strong sense of integrity, and incurably good attitude, Elle proves that first impressions aren't always right and that good guys can win and bad guys can get their due. This movie is witty, the characters are likable, and its premise is good. Although there are a few sexual references, there is no nudity. Unfortunately, Hollywood can't leave well enough alone and threw in a handful of profanity (along with a brief scene of Reese in a Playboy Bunny costume). Rated PG-13. (Reviewer—H. L.)

The Legend of Bagger Vance. This could have been a very sweet movie about a mysterious golf caddy, Bagger Vance, played superbly by Will Smith, who helps the former legendary Savannah golfer find his "authentic swing." The golfer, Randolf Junuh, played by Matt Damon, needs Bagger Vance's special touch after he loses interest in golf, and life, after his tragic experience in WWI. Although played out primarily on the golf course, this movie has little, if anything, to do with golf. It's about friendship, letting go, and being the person you were created to be. Unfortunately, a spattering of foul language and sexual innuendo are cast across the plot in such a conspicuous and unnecessary fashion as to cause suspicion that they were added just to boost the rating. If you can catch this one on television, it's a cute and uplifting movie. Rated PG-13. (Reviewer—H. L.)

 The Legend of Zorro. (PG-13)  (4 stars) Catherine Zeta-Jones Antonio Banderas. Critics didn't seem to think much of this film, but maybe because it was clean, simple, and fun. The plot seems a little unlikely, especially at the beginning, but stay tuned, and all is explained. Along the way there are themes exploring of a father's relationship to his son--Zorro's gone too much--and  personal love that is sacrificial in the interest of accomplishing a greater good. Lots of action, and excitement. Good for all audiences. Enjoy. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Left Behind. Poor screen adaptation of the book by the same name, which purports to tell the story of what the world will experience during "the tribulation period," which it teaches will follow immediately after the rapture of the Church. Unless you've read the book, however, the movie will leave you befuddled. There is little explanation of why these terrors are falling upon the Earth, leaving viewers to think that the God of the Bible is capricious and vindictive. Nor is the gospel of Jesus Christ clearly presented. Violence is simply befalling the world and Christians are pointing to the Bible, but it is never clearly explained why. If this poorly written, poorly acted movie is an example of alternative Christian viewing, it is my sincere hope that Christian filmmaking will improve in quality before they start putting movies on mainstream shelves. I gave this a star for "family viewing," but I don't recommend it. Rated PG-13 for violence. (Reviewer—H. L.)

The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. (R) Bill Murray, Owen Wilson, Cate Blanchett, Willem DeFoe,  Jeff Goldblum. With a cast like this, can a movie go wrong?  Well, yes. At least this one does. Starring in this sardonic parody of an action adventure  film, Murray plays an incompetent,  once-famous sea adventurer who now struggles to fund his voyages but  continues to  film his misadventures  with a cast of near-do-wells, who are  equally incompetent, supported by Murray's sloppy attitude and willingness to steal whatever he needs to fund his enterprises.  I bailed out of the movie with about half-an-hour to go, and returned just in time to see the "tragic" death scene (there's nothing much that's actually  funny in this movie, despite its being assigned the "comedy" category). Filmed with a stylized, dead-pan  "humor," the movie is full of casual swearing and offensive language, and  is nearly unwatchable for its mind-numbing story-line. Even stalwart fans of Bill Murray may have difficulty appreciating his character here: part  Henny Youngman, part  007, and very little of Jacques Cousteau.  Similarly, the supporting cast of stars are nearly unrecognizable in their strangely warped roles. Fans of British television humor  would likely find the landscape of this movie more familiar than Hollywood film goers, but that's not enough to save this campy film, illustrated at times by animated underwater scenes and washed in a shopping-mall ochre-orange pallet. I can't think of a good reason to rent this film. (Reviewer — G. P.)

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. This screen adaptation of J. R. R. Tolkien's classic fantasy novel contain no offensive language or sexual situations, but graphic imagery and violence make this film not suitable for younger children. Part one of the classic Lord of the Rings trilogy, this is a dark movie, following the journey of Frodo the hobbit, who must safeguard a finger-ring that bears the lure and power of cosmic evil. Despite the fact that Tolkien was a life-long Catholic, traveled in the same circles as C. S. Lewis, and was a scholar of ancient languages, there's little here to appeal to the spirit. If you like gigantic, animatronic, Satanic beings roaring from the screen, slimy red-eyed monsters swinging large weapons, and violent battle scenes provoked by the titanic clash of wizards, however, you'll love this movie. There is tremendous pleasure to be found in the beauty of New Zealand, where the movie was filmed, as well as the sweetness and integrity of the main characters, but for the adult looking for a higher-level of mythic or allegorical meaning behind the action, you will have to look hard. Although Tolkein's trilogy is, in fact, a loose biblical allegory, it is not apparent in the part one of this trilogy. Indeed, this movie never rises above the level of graphic battles and evil wizardry and is quite dark. Viewed outside its biblical allegorical context, this film must rate a "caution." For strong Christians, who can keep a clear eye on the biblical allegory and who are able to view the film in its larger context (see review of The Two Towers), it is worth watching for fans of this genre. It is not for young children. Rated PG-13. (Reviewer—G.P., H. L.)

The Lord of the Rings — The Two Towers. This is part two of J. R. R. Tolkein's Lord of the Rings trilogy, which is a loose allegory of the build-up to the biblical battle of Armageddon. Except that it takes place in the fantastic world of Middle Earth, a land of wizards, hobbits, elves, men, demonic orks, and other fantasy creatures. In this world, good is portrayed by Gandalf the Wizard, who plays the role of Jesus, and evil is portrayed by Saron, the evil "eye in the sky," who is looking to take over Middle Earth through possession of the Wizard Saroman, his puppet (playing the role of the Antichrist, apparently). In this film, Frodo the Hobbit and his friend and guardian, Sam, continue their quest to reach the evil land of Mordor, home to Satanic Saron, so that he can cast the Ring of Power into the fires from whence it was created and destroy it once and for all. In part two, the biblical allegory is much more clear. This is still a movie that is not for children. The demonic characters, portrayal of violence, and gloom throughout the movie would be far too intense for even older children. I remember reading these books as a young teen and being overwhelmed and terrified by the dread and despair. Now those scenes are brought to vivid life on the screen. The parallel between the extraordinary power and lure of the Ring of Power and the power of sin in the life of the believer — the only way to avoid the lure of which is to have no contact whatsoever — is extremely powerful. This is, perhaps, the most poignant part of the film. If you are an adult Christian and can keep to keep it in its larger biblical context and maintain a strong eye on the allegory throughout this film, however, it is definitely worth watching. Rated PG-13. (Reviewer — H. L. )

Lost in Translation. For Christian viewers there’s really nothing here. To be fair, the film is beautifully made, and if you haven’t seen Tokyo at night, you may enjoy the setting. Otherwise, the plot takes us to places—and lingers—where most Christians would not normally want to be: into bars, drinking parties, and, momentarily, even a strip club. But, otherwise, the dialogue is clean and there’s no physical interaction between Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson, despite the constant suggestion that the film is moving in that direction. Murray plays a “film star” going through the humiliation of making a liquor commercial in Japan; while Johansson is a young married woman left alone by her photographer husband. Murray and she become friends and share their lonely times together. That’s it. No romance, no violence, no intrigue. Just their awkward attempts to fill the time with Tokyo’s nightlife, while their significant others are away. There’s a bit of humor in the portrayal of the culture clash between Japanese and Western customs, which gives Murray some comic moments; but otherwise, there’s not enough drama to warrant a “best actor” nomination for the Oscar; he mostly plays the role deadpan, lonely, and “lost.” My recommendation, don’t bother being lost with him. This is a film that leaves you feeling just as unfulfilled as the characters.  Rated R. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Luther. Starring Joseph Fiennes ("Shakespeare in Love"), Alfred Molina, and Peter Ustinov, this is a moderately entertaining dramatization of the life of Martin Luther, whose confrontation with the Catholic Church helped bring about the Protestant Reformation. As a young monk, Luther is sent to Rome on a simple errand, but returns feeling revulsion for the corruption he sees there — priests selling indulgences and monks visiting brothels. His response is to post his "95 Theses" on the door of his church in Wittenberg, Germany, challenging the teaching of the Church and putting him in direct conflict with the authority of Rome. In the short context of the film, this sets into motion a civil revolt that results in the death of thousands, and a complete break with the political and religious authority of the Catholic heirarchy. Fiennes' portrayal of Luther, however, is less than spiritual or inspiring; he is shown as early on  being wracked with doubt and insecurity, and later as filled with remorse and petty anger. However, the film does provide a useful introduction to the origins of Protestantism, while offering a visually rich recreation of life in the early 16th Century. With the outcome of the plot not in doubt, there is little true drama, though there are a couple of chilling scenes of Luther standing trial before the powerful bishops who insist that he recant or be put to the fiery stake of the Inquisition. It's a churchly-clean film, suitable for most audiences, though there are some scenes of violence and dead bodies that would be disturbing to younger viewers. Nevertheless, this is pretty good primer on the subject and a reasonably good way to spend an evening of educational entertainment.  (Reviewer — G. P.)

Man on Fire. (Rated R for language and violence)  Denzel Washington, Christopher Walken, Mickey Rourke, Marc Anthony, Dakota Fanning. If you've ever thought revenge should be executed immediately, and not in the future, this movie's for you. However, it's not the macho-Hollywood hero blow-em-up movie you might expect. Loosely based on a true story, the movie portrays a burned-out special-ops, former covert government assassin (Denzel Washington), who now is living on Jack Daniels. Along comes a job as a body-guard for a nine-year-old American girl (played exquisitely by Dakota Fanning) living in Mexico City, where brutal kidnappings are a way of life. Washington's character, "Creasy," takes the job reluctantly and finds his love for the little girl drawing him into a violent journey of revenge when she, too, is kidnapped. In all the years of watching Hollywood movies, I've seen characters even mention the Bible favorably only a handful of times, and this is one of them. Creasy is shown reading from the Bible, seeking from it answers and consolation, and even quoting it from memory, while also encouraging the little girl's mother to read it, too. Yet, he's a man conflicted, believing he may be beyond forgiveness for his past life as a stone-cold killer for the government. This movie takes us on a sometimes violent, brutal journey, yet it is ultimately a journey of redemption. In a couple of heated moments, there is some vulgar language, but it's never gratuitous; the same is true of the violence. Be aware, though, that Creasy violently kills his adversaries on-screen, in cold-blood, and without mercy. Adults looking for a serious, intense action drama will find this a challenging study of a complex man fighting both his own demons and those in the dirty business of kidnapping for profit. Set on location in Mexico, and accurately portraying how this "business" is being done, even today, this film stays with you long after you return it to the video store.  For the right audience, it's a powerful, though troubling journey. But will certainly keep your attention. (Reviewer — G. P.)

The Manchurian Candidate. An update of the 1962 version starring Frank Sinatra, this new Jonathan Demme treatment follows the basic elements of the first, but recasts the story in its own terms. It is quite good, but not for the squeamish. Drawing on the popularity of television’s graphic CSI-style depictions of body-invasive procedures, there are scenes of drilling into skulls, bloody removals of implants, and graphic violence that some viewers may not want to see. Set in contemporary times, Denzel Washington plays the role of a platoon leader doing reconnaissance in Iraq, just prior to the first Gulf War; his squad is attacked and subsequently victimized by a global corporation bent on putting the first mind-controlled president into office, by way of assassination. As disturbing as it is dramatic for its themes of political manipulation, this a well-made film and worth the effort to see, but it’s not light entertainment. Viewers comfortable with current graphic trends in television will be okay with it; those not comfortable with conspiracy theories and the realties of political manipulation may not like the story line. But it is a thought-provoking update featuring single-minded powerful forces that are bent on controlling others in order to achieve their own financial and political gains. Contains a few instances of profanity. Otherwise the truly profane elements derive from the plot itself, which is insidious. Meryl Streep plays the controlling "stage mother" with a twist, adding effectively to the themes of conspiracy and betrayal.  Rated R. (Reviewer — G. P.)

 March of the Penguins. Not rated. Despite all of the wonderful praise for this movie, it's basically just a pretty good nature film, showing the life and death struggles of Emperor penguins living in the Antarctic. Yes, it's well-made and tells a compelling story of the penguins, who must walk up to seventy miles to their breeding grounds, in extremely cold and harsh conditions, and then walk arduously back (sometimes making several trips) to feed their fragile chicks. There's a little sadness in seeing some of the chicks and eggs frozen on the ice, and some drama as the chicks are attacked by aerial predators. But the tension is brief and quite moderate. And life goes on. Perhaps the story itself is so amazing that it can't fully be captured on film, but somehow, this was not such an extraordinary viewing experience that it can stand up to the rave reviews. Rather, it's just a well-made documentary of the annual life-cycle of some pretty extraordinary creatures. (Reviewer — G. P.)

  Matador. (R) Despite its warm and fuzzy stars, Pierce Brosnan and Greg Kinear, this is one vile, vulgar film. Contains offensive content, prolific profanity and overt, offensive sexual activity. No redeeming qualities or themes; just an objectionable viewing experience. (Reviewer — G. P.)

1/2 Matchstick Men. Nicholas Cage. plays a con man with a twist — an obsessive-compulsive disorder that causes him to repeatedly perform simple tasks and disrupts his ability to interact normally with others. (Think Jack Nicholson in “As Good As It Gets.”) Enter a “daughter he didn't know he had,” and, in the midst of a lot of frantic pill-taking, the plot (finally) begins. Unfortunately, there's nothing very funny about obsessive compulsive behavior, despite the filmmakers' apparent belief that there is; so a half-hour of watching Cage obsessing on the screen before the movie even gets going is tedious and unpleasant to watch. Otherwise, the film is mostly clean and non-offensive — but with several big exceptions, including the obligatory swearing (g-dm) about half-way through (only once, but blatant); and a short bar scene featuring a woman salaciously sliding down a pole in skimpy attire. But that's not the only reason to avoid this movie. The bottom line is that it's not very good. The first half is slow and rather painful to sit through, as Cage performs his manic imitation of a sadly ill person; and the second half is only moderately interesting as the plot develops, which, in the end, is not all that creative or particularly satisfying. To be fair, there are some entertaining moments, as Cage gets drawn into teaching his youthful accomplice (played beautifully by Alison Lohman) the art of the con (which, however, includes her using vulgar language and making an obscene gesture at an airport concession). But don't be fooled by the Hollywood hype. This is just another average film with some offensive content; and there are certainly better ways to spend your time rather than to rush out and see it. Rated PG-13. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Meet the Parents. This is a potentially cute film about the mistaken intentions, and even mistaken identities (including for a cat), when a well-intentioned suitor, played by Ben Stiller, attempts to meet his girlfriends' parents to ask her father, played by Robert DeNiro, for his daughter's hand in marriage. The former CIA agent takes an instant dislike to the Stiller, and to make matters worse, disaster seems to follow the poor guy wherever he goes. The film is entertaining if predictable, and the profanity is held in restraint, but it cannot be recommended. Although its ultimate themes are honesty, integrity, and trust, it is ruined by the poor attempt at humor by making the Stiller character's last name "Focker," which causes the viewer to hear this offensive term constantly through the film. There are a few veiled references to the main character's living arrangement out of wedlock, but there is no sex or nudity. Rated PG-13 for language. (Reviewer—H. L.)

Men of Honor. This is a well-made movie with a terrific plot based on a real-life story. Cuba Gooding Jr. is a young man from a poor, farming background who fights to become a Navy diver during the time before the U.S. Navy fully accepted integration. His character is strong, smart, and full of integrity. With the exception of the character of Billy Sunday, played by Robert DeNiro, the movie has no sex or language and is supportive of family values. You must have a strong stomach to take Billy's steady stream of profanity and blasphemous attitudes, however, which regard neither God nor man (the difference between himself and Billy Sunday, the famous preacher, he says, is that "[Billy Sunday, the preacher] worked for God, and I AM God!"), and this is, unfortunately, enough to spoil an otherwise excellent movie. Rated R. (Reviewer—H. L.)

Mickey Blue Eyes. Hugh Grant plays a bumbling art auctioneer whose marriage proposal to his girlfriend (Jeanne Tripplehorn) leads him to discover why she's been avoiding introducing him to her family — her father (James Caan) is a mafia kingpin. When Grant tries to maintain go forward with the marriage without intricating himself in a mob lifestyle, he finds that the mob has no interest in letting him do so. He also finds that getting out of the mess is much more difficult than getting in. By Hollywood standards, this is a very clean movie, with no violence and no sexual content, but the characters regularly use the Lord's name in vain, along with other profanity. The subject matter, while handled in a light comedic fashion, glorifies the mafia lifestyle, including murder, betrayal, and deceit. One wants to write off the movie as harmless fun, but seen through the Lord's eyes, is unacceptable. Rated R. (Reviewer — H. L.)

1/2 Minority Report. This film has an interesting premise and a big-time intensity that Steven Spielberg brings to movie-making. But despite its impressive high-tech visual appeal, this film is ultimately disturbing. Based on a short story about a futuristic plan to predict and prevent capital crimes before they happen, the film casts Tom Cruise as the head policeman whose task it is to locate and arrest suspects before they act. The problem lies in the source of those future predictions: three young humans, “pre-cogs,” whose visions depicting what is about to happen are channeled into a computer system that is monitored by the police. Ultimately, Cruise is himself is accused of a “pre-murder” and pursued by his own attack squad. There's lots of dramatic action and eye-popping chase scenes, but the action is violent and disturbing. Even more disturbing, however, are the writhing agonies of the main visionary character, which looks too much like the writhings of someone possessed. The result is that the whole film is very dark and you don't come away feeling very good about having watched it. Also, there are some instances of swearing, sexual situations (the movie opens with a graphic depiction of adultery), and drug use that would make this unsuitable for Christian viewing. Fans of fast action, intrigue, suspense, and betrayal may like the movie, but it's hard to get past the lingering images of that “possessed” pre-cog. Unless you feel you really must see all of Tom Cruise's films, let this one pass. (Reviewer — G. P.)

Miss Congeniality. Sandra Bullock plays an FBI agent who goes under cover at the Miss America pageant to protect the participants from a serial bomber. But there's a catch — she walks like a man, fights like a man, and chews with her mouth open. Can she be converted into a lady in time? This modern-day take-off of My Fair Lady is cute, although not necessarily memorable, and watchable if seen on television. The uncut movie contains strong language, and in one scene, the misuse of the name of Jesus will make sensitive viewers wilt. In one scene, the girls wind down in a local club, shooting back drinks in tall skinny test tubes, but beyond this, there is no sexual or other overtly offensive content. Co-starring Benjamin Bratt. Rated R. (Reviewer—H. L.)

The Missing. Not for the feint of heart, but an unusual and riveting Western featuring sterling performances by Cate Blanchette and Tommy Lee Jones. This is the story of a single mother with two young daughters living in northern New Mexico, whose life is suddenly turned upside down, first by the unexpected appearance of a father who had abandoned her as a child and then by a renegade band of Indians who kidnap the older daughter, intending to sell her across the Mexican border. The kidnappers are lead by a thoroughly evil Apache shaman whose cruelty seems to know no bounds. There are moments of violence and visually graphic injuries that could be upsetting to some viewers, but otherwise this is an intelligent film for adults, described by the film’s director Ron Howard as a "suspense thriller in a Western setting." Authentic dialogue in the Chiracahua language complements the dramatic action and panoramic setting. This is a compelling story of a father and daughter who must come to terms with years of estrangement in the midst of a harsh and brutal drama. Rate R for violent content, though PG-13 would perhaps be as appropriate.  (Reviewer — G. P.)

Mr. and Mrs. Smith  (PG-13)  Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. It would be easy not to like this film: Two Hollywood megastars, "hot" subjects of the tabloids and entertainment shows, paired in a film that is transparently designed to ensure box-office sales. And so it is. But it's also a very funny, clever run-up of "spy-vs.-spy" films and a campy, satirical treatment of the big-gun, blow-em-up school of action movie. But you must be patient:. The first half-hour makes it seem as if you've rented  a bad Woody Allen film. The action is framed in the context of marriage counseling sessions for these two professional assassins, who discover each other's professions only after being married for five or six years," and who are using their campy-dull suburban lives as cover for their real-life activities. However, they work for rival companies, which makes them direct  competitors and therefore each other's deadly enemies. Slowly, the story begins to move, and then it's action-central the rest of the way. There's enough sexually suggestive interaction between Jolie and Pitt to explain why they've become a Hollywood couple, but the serious stuff is quickly edited out and left to the imagination. Pitt quietly utters Jesus' name several times, but otherwise the dialogue is clean. This film is probably best for adults who get the in-jokes, can handle a couple of knock-down drag-out fights between the main characters, and who like a lot of firepower, not only at the box office, but also on the screen. Be prepared for unexpected laughs and a lot of silly good fun, as spy-vs.-spy takes on an added Hollywood twist by making the battle of the sexes a literal war..but in a "good way."  Enjoy.  (Reviewer — G. P.)

Must Love Dogs.  (PG-13) John Cusak, Diane Lane, Elizabeth Perkins, Christopher Plummer, Dermot Mulroney, Stockard Channing. Over-the-top for "chick-flickness," this is a typical Hollywood romantic comedy, starring the ever-interesting John Cusak and Diane Lane. Lane plays  a recently divorced woman from a large family, whose siblings are trying to get her back into the dating market via Internet dating. Cusak seems a bit out of place here, and he's given some pretty awful cliché dialogue. But
the film is very clean and devoid of objectionable language--except for one glaring ratings-ensuring use of God's name in vain, which occurs, of course, in the very middle of the movie. There are a couple of laughs along the way, and some dog-friendly scenes. But it's overly-packed with painfully prolonged dating and "men-talk" dialogue. Obviously, not a "guys movie," it is, however, generally harmless, if predictable, and okay for an easy evening's entertainment. (Reviewer — G. P.)